I happen to be the king of telling bad jokes, especially while drunk:
What did the farmer say when his tractor was missing?
Where's my tractor?
Two cows are in a field, one cow say to the other cow, "Moo."
The other cow says "holy fuck that's what I was gonna say."
Two apples are in an oven.
One apple says to the other apple, "man it sure is hot in here"
The other apple says, "AHHHH!! A talking apple!!!"
Also dead baby jokes are a personal favorite